I'm becoming a father soon

This is happening. Our baby girl will be born in two months. Am I ready? Not really. I’ve never taken care of, let alone touched, a newborn baby. (How the hell did I never learn how to raise a human?) I’m trying to become a responsible father, though. I just finished a week-long course to become a licensed postpartum coordinator. This way, my wife receives government subsidies to hire me as a professional caretaker. (Yay, I’m getting a paycheck soon.)

So far, I’ve learned that taking care of a baby is no joke. Diaper changing, bathing, breastfeeding, playing, sleeping, massaging (both the baby and mother). I’ve had so many questions. How do I clean my baby’s umbilical cord? What should I do when my baby cries? What kind of food should my wife eat after giving birth? Where does my baby sleep? What kind of chair is best for breastfeeding? What kind of towels are best for babies? Should I buy special detergent for the baby? Is there a way to communicate with babies? There’s a load of information I have to keep track of.

I’m still not sure how my life will change after our daughter is born. Even the 3-D ultrasound images of my daughter, made possible by alien-level technology, fail to convince me that I’m now responsible for a new human being in this universe. People say having a kid is one of the few chances to be truly selfless. Maybe I’ll finally be free from my egocentric mindset and realize it’s possible to lead a life of love.

One day my daughter will read this post. How amazing is that? I see you, Goyo. I welcome you to this world.